Outstanding Soccer Cheap Shot

Nice kick to the dome.  If I know soccer, the dude that got kicked is probably still on the ground....

Is Alex Morgan The Hottest Chick On The USA Women's Soccer Team?

Hottie, hottie, hottie.  I admit it - I'm totally turned by this USA women's soccer team.  In general, I could give two fucks about soccer.  I'm a baseball, football, basketball and hockey guy.  But every 4 years, when it's us against the world in the World Cup I guess my patriotism takes over a little bit.  It's the same thing with the Olympics.  There's something about rootin' for the good ol' US of A in the highest level of competition that gets the juices flowin'.  Doesn't matter if it's soccer or skiing or track or swimming - sports I wouldn't normally watch.  When national pride is at stake, I'm in.  Big time.  Let's crank it up, Alex.  Score the winning goal in the World Cup and you can crush any dick you want (including mine - call me) for the next 4 years.  USA!  USA!  

Is Team USA Soccer Star Abby Wambach Gay?

Not that there's anything wrong with that.  Personally I don't care if she is or isn't.  And by the way, chick is the clutchest member of Team USA.  Her goals against Brazil and France have already secured her that legacy.  But all the publicity she's gettin' made me wonder whether she has a little bit of the gay.  The butch haircut, the headband.  I don't think she's married and she's 31.  Don't you wonder about everybody, male or female once they pass their thirties?  I mean, more than half of most top-notch female athletes are scissor sisters, right?  Just wonderin'....

USA Women's Soccer Team Win For The Ages

We bash soccer all the time here at the Speakeasy and for good reason.  Most of the crap that led up to this goal was typical soccer bullshit.  Lousy refs, fake injuries.  But this was about as clutch a come-from-behind moment as I've seen in sports on a long time.  So we'll take a one-day moratorium from shittin' on soccer and give the US women their due.  Now go win it all, ladies.  USA!

Swedish Female Soccer Player Swaps Jerseys With A Fan

It's times like these that actually make me re-think my stance on soccer.  A little more of this and a little less flopping and I just start paying more attention.

German National Soccer Chicks Pose For Playboy

Is it possible?  Could soccer be making a comeback here at the Speakeasy?  Not sure - maybe it's more like hot chicks always bein' around and not needing a comeback.  However, I highly recommend this experience for every national team.  We could have our own titty tournament.  Anyway, perky bunch of frauleins, huh?

Kazakhstan Soccer Player Kicks The Shit Out Of Another Kazakhstan Soccer Player - The Rest Of The World Wonders, "Who Gives A Shit?"

This dude was banned for life? Seriously? Why don't you cut off his balls while you're at it, too? C'mon you soccer pussies, Chara's hit on Pacioretty was way worse than this and he wasn't even suspended.  I feel pretty safe in saying that no one from the soccer community was involved in the Bin Laden operation.  Dude would still be rippin' it up in Pakistan, bangin' his seventy-nine wives while enjoying a life without cable TV, the internet or a cell phone.  I'm just sayin'...

Little Soccer Superstar

G-O-O-O-O-A-A-A-A-L. Sign him up!

Epic Soccer Ball Fail

Right back atcha, brother! Gotta love it when the prankster gets pranked. The kid bendin' over probably lost some bet or somethin' and our soccer star here figured this would be a good way to make him pay. Nice try dickwad - next time just take the 5 bucks. Pay attention!

Watch This Soccer Goalie's Epic Fail

And just like all soccer players he starts moaning and groaning about how it wasn't his fault. Cry me a river ya big wussbag. "The ref shoulda called foul." "The player ran into me." How 'bout this Mr. Goalie-baby? You suck. Bang.

Crazy Soccer Player Kicks An Owl Off The Field

Isn't that a fowl? Had to do it...

Dog Interrupts Soccer Game

Just a guess, but I say that soccer ball is filled with high quality cocaine. The team's next game is probably in some new country and the best way to smuggle some of Pablo Escobar's nose candy would be inside a soccer ball on a charter flight. Genius, you crafty drug cartel leader. Pure genius.

Soccer Nutshot For A Friday Afternoon

It takes leather balls to play soccer. The only surprising thing here is that he didn't fall down in agony and stay there until the stretcher showed up. Oh, wait, they only do that during games. Never mind.

One Soccer Wuss Blindsides Another Soccer Wuss In The Stands

This is irrefutable evidence that soccer fans are pussies all over the world. You kick a dude in the back, with no warning and he tumbles down the stands? No balls whatsoever my little Asian friend. How about you both walk down to field level and you challenge him mano a mano? Nope.  Never gonna happen because you have a vagina where your testicles should be.  What a dink. Karma, my friend. Never turn your back on anyone. Ever. Again. Pay the fuck attention!

Soccer Goalie Tricks

Okay, now it's gone too far. Recently we've posted trick shot vids from hoop players and football players. Now we get trick shots from soccer goalies? What's next baseball tricks! No, no, no. That's it - no more. From now on, trick shot videos must come from hot chicks in thongs or else they're not making the cut. Enough. Done. Pay attention!

Hey Kid, You Realize That Ball Is ROUND, Right?

Forget The 'Bloke", I'll Take The Bird

Funny little "futbol" interview. This is the kind of shit Cedric Maxwell got killed for, but I think it's hilarious. By the way, no matter what you think, tough to take your eyes of the reporter, huh? Okay, I'm a total chauvinist. Guilty. Pay attention!

Soccer Dude Has The Gay For Sugar Daddy Reporter (Or Maybe It's Just The Old Ben Gay In The Jockstrap Trick)

This is a little old but somehow I missed it. Thanks to Mark204 for the submission.

Chick Has Skills

Model With Impressive Soccer Skills - Watch more Funny Videos

Gratuitous Commercial Of Hot Chicks In Bikinis Playing Soccer On The Beach