Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Tiger Woods' Mistress Rachel Uchitel Showing Off Her Bikini Body In Miami With Her New Boyfriend

Looks like our little marriage-wrecker here is over Tiger, huh?  The new dude is Matt Hahn, almost 10 years younger than Mistress Rachel, who's 36.  And by the way, Rach is now a licensed private dick.  Of course it would appear that she's been an expert in private dicks for quite some time now, so it's nice to see it's official.

Okay, a little history.  Father dies of cocaine overdose.  Fiancee dies in 9/11 atacks.  Married another dude, divorced in 4 months.  Fucks Tiger and destroys his career.  Fucks David Boreanaz who goes from C-list celebrity to Z-list celebrity.  Goes on Celebrity Rehab and emerges as a PI with this new boy-toy.  My advice to Matty Hahn?  Run for the freakin' hillls!  Get outta Dodge as fast as you can.  This chick is the Kiss of Death, the Master of Disaster and the Black Widow all rolled up into one.  You will burn in hellfire if you stick around.  Mark my words Matthew, this is some free Bahtendah wisdom you're gettin' here.  Bang.  Done.  Pay attention!