LOUISIANA - If you thought night football games were bad in Death Valley at LSU, wait until you get a load of this: LSU has made plans to brew and sell its own beer. LSU is looking for new opportunities to generate revenue for the university, including getting into the beer business. The program will come from a partnership with the Tin Roof Brewing Co. and Mockler Beverage, and could begin distributing its products in the near future. The project was developed by LSU’s food science department with classes involved in creating the recipe. Ernie Ballard, a spokesman for LSU, says the logos and can designs are in the final stages with an eye towards placing beer on store shelves by fall. SEC policy prohibits alcohol sales in its member stadiums.
Well, that's it. It's over. LSU will now win every national title in football for the next 10 years and they'll probably become a powerhouse in lots of other sports as well. Who kew schools could sell their own beer? Now for most schools this wouldn't be a big deal. But LSU? Shit is gonna be huge! People in New Orleans probably drink more beer than anywhere on the planet with the possible exception of South Boston. It's beer and Hurricanes in epic proportions all day every day. LSU is about to become the Yankees of college football. They'll have shit-tons of money like you read about. Probably increase the salaries of everyone in the athletic department, build a new Superdome and pay the players more than they even do now. Wait, what? College players don't get paid? Yeah, right - they will now.
