The Baddest-Ass Bike Rider You'll See All Day

African madman's got skillz!

Just A Quick Afternoon Fail

Let this be a lesson, kiddies - always wear your helmet.   Oh, wait, never mind.

World Naked Bike Ride Rolls Through Melbourne, Australia

MELBOURNE - IT’S been a beautiful day for a leisurely cycle through the city - in the nude. About 145 riders covered in paint, glitter and flowers took to the streets of Melbourne for the 2011 World Naked Bike Ride today. Starting just after 3.30pm, the riders turned heads down Brunswick St, Lygon St and through the CBD while protesting oil dependency and promoting bike safety. Organiser Heidi Hill said this year’s ride was the most successful, with a record number of riders making it Australia’s biggest. “At the end of the ride everyone feels fantastic about themselves,” she said. More women got their gear off for the ride than ever before, with women making up almost half the riders, Ms Hill estimated. “There’s worse on TV, there’s worse everywhere - this is nonsexual. The body paint helps too, this is not rude” she said. Nude rider Flick, who also rode last year, said the ride was a fantastic, natural buzz. “We (Australians) still see nudity as a bit of a deviant thing, but we’re hoping to change that,” Flick said. Another nude rider, Andrew, who has taken part in the event every year, said participants did not want to provoke or upset anyone, but instead challenge ideas. “It’s very funny just seeing those reactions, it’s 98 per cent positive, people have got smiles on their faces.” First-time rider Abel said the idea was a lot of fun. “I just thought it was a great because and lots of people can join in for different causes,” he said. Motorists were patient, brides were shocked, and pedestrians gobsmacked, but in a first this year not one lewd comment or catcall was made, Ms Hill said.

I think I'm a closet hippie. No smarmy comments about this race, no juvenile humor. This is just a great way to call attention to a cause. Given the raping I'm taking at the gas station lately, the fact that these nice nudie people were protesting oil dependency sounds pretty good to me. Great idea people, just remember to wash those seats after the race. Pay attention!

Cracking Four Nuts At The Same Time

You'd think the second idiot would learn from the first idiot, but no, let's just keep crackin' our balls on that railing until we have nothing left to crack. Take a close look people, these are the future CEO's of America. Of course that they'll have extremely high-pitched voices.

Sissy Bike, Sissy Dog

Let's see this with a Rottweiler and a Harley....

Badass(es) Of The Day

First of all, I think I see bullet holes in the window. Second of all, although this dude is obviously a jackass, he's got balls the size of churchbells! The way he just nonchalantly walks away after plantin' his puss in the ground has to be admired. I think if the video kept rollin' we'd see him get up there and do it again. And if he failed again I think he'd just whip out the Glock and bust a few caps in that bike for bein' weak. Whole lotta balls. But wait...not quite the balls that THIS GUY has:

Whew!

How's Your Day Going?

...It can't be as bad as this dude's.  Buck up sport!

All I Want For Christmas Is Some Training Wheels