You've Seen All The Athletes, Now It's Time For A Trick Shot Video From A Doctor

What's up, Doc? I realize there's a good amount of editing goin' on here, but let's give ol' Sawbones some props. First bit of humor I've seen from a quack since like forever. And at least it's not another lame athlete seein' how many hits he can get on YouTube. I have a couple of friends who are doctors and while they're some of the best people you wanna meet, jokin' around is not, let's say, a real strength. Matter of fact, I think they kinda count on me for that shit since they're dealin' with life and death and sorrow on a daily basis.

A little Bahtendah prescription (see how I did that?) for ya - next time ya go see your doctor, have a little fun with 'em. Just might make their day. Pay attention!

Did This Doctor Pull A Shotgun On A Stripper And Demand Sex?

Sheriff: Leesburg Man Pulls Shotgun on Stripper

VIRGINIA - A Leesburg, Va., man will be arraigned Monday after a bizarre weekend incident in which he allegedly pulled a shotgun on a stripper who refused his demands for sexual favors. Sheriff’s deputies responded to the 43700 block of Lees Mill Square in Leesburg at 12:40 a.m. Sunday after several people called 911 to report that a man with a shotgun had fired a shot at two people in his front yard. Upon arrival, deputies found the suspect, later identified as Dr. Mehul Jitendra Shah, of the Dulles Foot and Ankle Institute, being held at gunpoint by a neighbor. Shah was reported to be extremely intoxicated, and had become upset when a stripper he had hired refused his requests for sex, according to police. "You mix alcohol with your judgement, these sort of things tend to happen from time to time," Detective Vincent DiBenedetto told NBC Washington's Pat Collins. The stripper has been identified as a 29-year-old Fairfax woman, deputies said. Witnesses reported that Shah brandished the shotgun at the woman and her bodyguard and fired a shot in their direction but did not cause any injury. An armed neighbor confronted Shah and held him until deputies arrived, authorities said. Shah was taken into custody and charged with abduction by force, reckless handling of a firearm and brandishing a firearm. In addition, summonses were served for firing the weapon within a public right of way and within 100 yards of a building. He is being held without bond at the Loudoun Adult Detention Center and will be arraigned Monday. The victim sustained minor cuts and bruises from falling while trying to escape the residence, deputies said. She was transported to Inova Loudoun Hospital at Lansdowne, where she was treated and released.

Doctor my ass. The dude's probably a chiropractor or got some online Phd. from some scam internet college. These people kill me. They want ya to call 'em doctors just so they can sound all important and shit. "Doctor" Shah here probably has a diploma that's not worth the paper it was printed on. He just wanted to be able to tell the relatives back in the old country that he was a bigshot success in America. Well doc, I got news for ya - you're a big hit in the good ol' USA now! Congratulations!

Doctor Cuts Off Woman's Clitoris - World's Biggest Woman-Hater?

Accused doctor removed clitoris: court

SMH.com - A doctor said a patient's husband was dead so it did not matter that he removed her clitoris during an operation, a Sydney jury has been told. Theatre nurse Sharon Demmery said she remembered the 2002 operation because of the large size of the tissue that was taken from the patient. She was giving evidence in the NSW District Court today at the trial of a doctor, who cannot be named for legal reasons. He has pleaded not guilty to maliciously inflicting grievous bodily harm (GBH) on Carolyn DeWaegeneire with intent to cause her GBH in August 2002. He also denies an alternative charge of maliciously inflicting GBH on the then 58-year-old widow. The Crown alleges the doctor did not have the patient's consent to remove her genitals, but the defence says he was trying to save Ms DeWaegeneire's life. She told the jury the doctor informed her he was going to remove a lesion but did not mention anything else. She had sought treatment for a small patch of discoloured skin on her labia, later identified as a form of pre-cancer. Ms Demmery said she noticed a "very large amount of tissue" was being removed during the operation. "I said 'That is fairly radical' and he said 'Yes, if I didn't take that much, the cancer would spread,'" Ms Demmery said. She said something came up about the clitoris and she said she told the doctor: "You wouldn't be taking my clitoris, no matter what. "He then said that the patient's husband was dead so it did not matter anyway." The nurse said all the patient's external genitalia were taken. She said the consent form for the operation said "simple vulvectomy", which she understood involved taking a small sample from the lesion area and taking a small margin around it. She said she did not consider the surgery undertaken coincided with the operation described on the consent form. The trial is continuing before Judge Greg Woods.

This Doctor Death dude sounds like a real prick, huh? Someone needs to tell old sawbones here that you can't just go around whacking of clits because your wife thinks you suck in bed or you have a little dick or you can't last long or you don't know how to give a woman the big "O" or you only get ugly chicks or you're secretly gay or you dress like a woman or a priest fucked you up when you were young or you have herpes or your nuts smell like ass-cheese or whores won't even take your money or your mommy touched you or you fuck goats on weekends. Just because you have issues, don't take it out on others. Bang. Pay the fuck attention!

Doctor Plows Through Liquor Store, Tries To Grab Beer

MyFoxBoston - A local doctor was charged with drunk driving after allegedly crashing his SUV through the windows of a Seekonk liquor store and then trying to steal beer. Dr. Joseph Grillo can be seen on surveillance footage plowing into Country Liquors early Wednesday morning. Grillo is then seen trying to reach inside to get a beer off of the counter. He is unable to reach it, so leaves the scene. The store manager thinks he crashed his car deliberately to steal beer. Grillo says he was trying to back up and accidentally went forward. Grillo was stopped by police, who had heard the crash. He was arrested and charged with driving under the influence.

The Doctor is In - well, partly in.  This is one thirsty dude, huh? Someone needs to tell ol' sawbones that we don't have drive-thru liquor stores here in Massachusetts.  Anyway, here's your prescription my good man: go directly to jail, do not pass "Go" and do not collect any brewskies! Bang. Pay attention!

Got Milk?

Helsinki Times
Finnish nipple-sucking doctor gets the sack
A doctor who sucked a young woman patient's nipple during a breast examination has been sacked, commercial broadcaster Channel Four Finland (Nelonen) reported Monday. Earlier this month the Supreme Court fined the man 4,800 euros. A district court had dismissed malpractice and sexual abuse charges, with the Rovaniemi appeals court upholding the lower court's ruling last year.


Supposedly the doctor's defense was that he was using some old mid-wives diagnostic test.  Nice try, doc.  Breaking news bulletin - you're not a mid-wife!  Bang.  Pay attention!

It's Always In Florida

Orlando Sentinel
PARKLAND, Florida — A South Florida doctor has died after authorities say she was accidentally strangled by an electronic neck massager on Christmas Eve. Kenneth Gegerson called 911 after finding his wife's body on the bedroom floor next to the neck massager. Paramedics pronounced 37-year-old Michelle Ferrari-Gegerson dead at the scene. Authorities believe her necklace got caught in the massager and it quickly tightened around her neck. According to Broward Sheriff's authorities, Ferrari-Gegerson spent the evening wrapping gifts and getting ready for work while using the massager to relieve neck pain.


At least her neck isn't sore anymore....